Thursday, December 29, 2005

Letter rip

Sheeeeminey. I mean, I know a blog is public, which is partly the point, but I must keep in mind that the Post puts a link to your blog if you link to one of its stories. Yikes! Thanks for the alert, Becky.
In a defensive move -- you're gonna love this -- I'm going to post an ooey-gooey Lizzy-filled entry right on top! So if anyone comes here looking for politics, they will be repulsed and flee before the kid-friendliness sends them into a sugar coma. YESSSSSS.

But seriously, Lizzy did something awesome yesterday. It's so wild to see your kid grow and mature and advance and learn. Crazy, crazy stuff.


When Matt and I got to the day care, the teacher pulled us aside and said she had something to show us. She didn't want to give it to us yet -- they keep evidence of the kids' advancement, apparently -- but she showed us a paper on which Lizzy had WRITTEN HER NAME. Granted, it was "Lizzy," not "Elizabeth" -- only four letters to master -- but, oh my gosh! How amazing! Matt and I were flipping out. It's just the cutest thing. I wish I had a photo of it to post here. Maybe I'll work on that.
Lizzy -- turning our world upside down, one letter at a time. :)

Wednesday, December 28, 2005

notes on the news

I don't usually do commentary on the news here, but I've seen a few things in the past couple of days that have piqued my interest. This first one isn't exactly a secret, as I'm told it's on the front page of the Washington Post today. It's a subject that Matt and I talk about a lot, especially in terms of our neighborhood. Check it out:

(link removed in hopes that Post doesn't link to my blog anymore)

But, in brief, the Powers That Be in Manassas have decided that people who own (or rent -- what's the difference) can't have people living with them who aren't "related." And by related, I mean, not IMMEDIATE family. Nephew? Cousin? Not a relative. Not if you already have four or five people in your home -- there's a nifty formula to calculate how many people you're allowed to have. And, okay. But it seems a BIT stringent. Juuust a bit. And it seems suspiciously geared toward causing great pain and inconvenience to a certain minority segment.

Here's an especially intriguing bit of the Post's story, which you can probably still search for at the Post's Web site:

The Dec. 5 town hall meeting at Round Elementary School was advertised in the usual way, without any special outreach to the Latino community. About 30 residents attended, no one objected to the ordinance, and the City Council easily adopted it. Then Brian Smith, chief building official, stood up to explain the new concept in town: consanguinity.

Under the city's old, broad definition of family, just about any group of relatives, however distantly related, was allowed to share a single-family house, along with one unrelated person.

The problem with that, Smith explained, was that when inspectors responded to a complaint, they often found houses full of aunts, uncles, cousins and extended relatives but no violations, because the total number was below the occupancy limit.

"We were stymied by families who met the existing definition," Smith said. And so the city changed the rules to break up more households.


I have two problems with this:
1) There's generally no attempt made to reach out to Spanish-speaking folks on these matters, even when the matter is likely more relevant to them than to others. Yes, it probably would take some effort and expense to translate the notice. But isn't that part of the deal?
2) I'm unclear why (and how, really) we can regulate who lives in someone's house. Are you telling me, if I want a good friend to stay with me, and I have a family of four (or however many) already, he/she can't?
Wow.

Maybe there are angles to this that I'm not grasping at this point. But it smells an awful lot like a way to hassle Hispanics to me.

I'll be painfully honest here. It's a little unsettling to certain not-so-pretty parts of my heart when I hear someone racing through the neighborhood, strange Latino music a-blasting. I remind myself that I don't appreciate any music a-blasting most of the time -- and it always seems to happen when Lizzy's napping, or maybe that's when I notice it. So it's not so much a racial/social thing as an age thing, probably. And sometimes I feel like Hispanic men are giving me certain looks a bit more than I'd like. I'm not a big fan of the ogling and whistling.

But. I have no right (nor inclination, truly) to run them out of "my" neighborhood -- where I've resided an entire 10 months -- or "my" town. (God help me when I start identifying with Manassas that way.)

And. I hate to generalize here -- I hope this doesn't offend -- but it seems like most of the Hispanic people I see are the ones out there doing everyone's dirty work. The jobs the rest of us are too good for. And they seem to be doing those jobs cheerfully, efficiently and well. I take my hat off to the hard-working folks who do stuff that I can't, or won't, do. I've worked in a factory, and in fields, with migrant workers, some of whom I know weren't here legally. I barely made it through those college summers, with only the hope of "getting out soon" sustaining me. And THAT'S THEIR LIVELIHOOD. It still blows my mind. How fortunate and, frankly, spoiled I am to sit at a desk all day and make a lot more than a lot of them do.

So, I'm rather offended when I see people crafting laws to edge them out of precious Manassas. I mean, please. Because they have seven people in a five-bedroom home? I'm just sitting here shaking my head, the more I think about it.
(as usual, dissenting opinions more than welcome. Or any other kinds.)

I'll save the other news thingies for another post after I get some more of my cushy desk work done. :)

Friday, December 23, 2005

Merry Christmas to all,

and to all a good weekend!
From our family to yours.

Wednesday, December 21, 2005

Your input needed

My friend Jayster, with whom I worked in Germany and who is now in California, requests that y'all give him some food for thought. He sent me the following e-mail this morning. I gave it my best 15 seconds of pondering, then shot back a reply. He and I would love to see what you come up with. I bet those who check in with this blog will have some great ideas.
(So -- let 'er rip.)

Good morning, Kate!

OK, so I might have told you that I'm doing this writing course through the Christian Writers Guild. One of my assignments that I'm turning in Dec. 31 revolves around the following question: "If you had a megaphone, what message would you broadcast to the Christian Community, in 100 words or less?"

What say you, o friend? I'm in the process of formulating an answer for my assignment and I've been asking all of my friends.

Tag, you're it. -- Jay

Tuesday, December 20, 2005

don't mess with me; this cucumber's loaded

A recent favorite!


I feel poopy; oh so poopy

I'm saying this less to whip up sympathy than to explain any meagerness in blogging posts...

And, my apologies to the fine lyricists of West Side Story. But your songs are so darned adaptable!

Lizzy brought home some insidious little bug awhile back. She was coughing and hacking away for a good five weeks. She finally seems better. I can tell because she has to FAKE coughing when I cough. She thinks it's funny. If she were still under the influence, the faking would be unnecessary.
So this bugger makes junk collect in my throat -- hey, stop reading if you don't want to know -- but isn't a cold, exactly. And gives me a headache and a general feeling of malaise and unwellness. I have been living on aspirin for weeks now.
It definitely could be worse -- but if it were, I would have to stay home in bed. So I'm trying to function normally. It's not a good season to have to fake normal function. I deeply resent every request to bring something to this, that or the other 'holiday party.' Which normally would not be a big deal.
Oh, who am I kidding. It still would be. Remembering and gathering everything I need for daily life seems hard enough, most days.
I keep telling myself the usual about how I am so lucky to have a great family, a roof over my head and warm bed at night and food to eat and on and on, but in truth, I just want to be healthy. I don't like coughing so hard I seriously wonder if I'm going to throw up. (If anyone saw me at church on Sunday during the Kanye West song, that's what was up. It wasn't a reaction to Kanye West, actually.)

(and, yes, we played a Kanye West song at church on Sunday. I don't know why, but it was kinda cool.)
(at least, Matt said it was a Kanye West song. I'm certainly no expert.)

In other news, this year I'm giving up on hand-writing my Christmas cards. And boy, did they go fast last night! I got at least 20 done in an hour. It was AWESOME. I'm never goin' back, baby! Those who have received my chicken scratch in the past will be oh so grateful. Because, really. What's the point of a card you can't read. I've still got more to send out. Maybe it'll get done. Another downside to the feeling icky thing: Nothing gets done. If it's sleep or productivity, sleep wins. Last night I read Lizzy books (Dumbo and a Veggie Tales book in which I have to mimic a number of goofy accents, if you want to know), and then fell asleep next to her in my work clothes. All night. Something I have ridiculed Matt for doing (the work clothes thing; I will pry him out of Lizzy's bed if he falls asleep there).

Lizzy loved the Super Grover show, in case you were wondering. The best was at the intermission, when -- after they'd already soaked us for the price of admission, and tried to tempt us with other junk at the door -- two guys headed down to the floor with EIGHT-DOLLAR Elmo balloons. And, really, what child doesn't want an Elmo balloon, when it's all bobbing in your face and stuff. Matt and I put our foot down on that one. I told Lizzy, "Later." And, some other day, I'm sure we WILL get an Elmo balloon! So there.

The church Christmas party was so fun! Matt really really loved it. I love (hm, I'm creative today in my word usage, eh?) to see him having good conversations with my friends. There's such a feeling of general goodwill, and caring ... It's like a little piece of heaven. For the benefit of the four people who read this who didn't already receive Ross' Christmas party photos, here are two of (parts of) Lizzy and me:




Lizzy's day care party was chaotic. Too many kids/parents, too little space. Aiieeee. Everyone seemed to like their gifts, so that was a relief.

One downside to a blog is that, of course, one must be careful not to offend anyone by putting someone else's personal stuff out there along with yours. But, I have procured permission from the relevant party to share with you the following:

Saturday: Matt gets a check from his dad. For $500. For Christmas. So he gives me $100 (from his dad) and pockets $400. I said, “Yeah, right! Isn’t this to split three ways?” (w/Lizzy) He’s all, "No! What? Are you serious? You don’t think I’m being fair?" When I realized he wasn’t joking, I just shut up about it. I mean, okay. $100 is a generous gift. But it was just bizarre. We were both looking at each other like the other was a serious and complete moron/skinflint.

So he tells me Sunday night that his dad called to say he was supposed to split it evenly FOUR ways, including with his brother…

HA HA HA HA HA.

Thursday, December 15, 2005

shivering on the job

Our computer system is down, and I've already exhausted most of the other e-goofing around possibilities I can think of, so it's time for ... a pointless blog entry!
Though I am a few "House" recaps behind on televisionwithoutpity.com. Oh, well. You're more important, right?!

It has been 63 or 64 degrees in my corner of the office for the past couple of weeks. The building's facade (or something) is being repaired, and rumor has it, the cold air is seeping in and making us miserable. We share a wall with a big, vast, un-insulated storage area, so it makes us cold... Waaaaaaah. Just had to whine a bit.
Lizzy brought home this icky cough thing that I cannot shake. I suspect the office temps are not making it better. After about a month of scary hacking, she seems to be improving, so there's hope for Matt and me, too.

Once again, weather promises to be icky enough to prompt school cancellations. Ugh. Please, God! I want to come to work tomorrow! You know it's ridiculous when I'm saying that. (Maggie, you are so sweet to volunteer to take Lizzy, but I'd rather wait until things were completely dire before calling on you. Thank you.)
For now, I'm hoping tomorrow will be okay. It's supposed to warm up, so there's that. You know, all the way to the mid-40s!
Here's where those of you who 'did time' in the Midwest or similar parts can tell me what a wimp I am. And you will get no debate from me about it.

I should add here how grateful it makes me, when I'm a little uncomfortable. I walk around the block to get my $3 Starbucks latte, and think, "Sheeminey, it's freezing out here!" And feel sorry for my little shivering self. Then I think about the homeless; those who can't afford their heating bills this winter; those in the South/Southeast who are without power because of the latest storm. God bless and keep them.

'Tis the season for three parties -- two holiday parties, one Christmas party, hee! -- in the next two days. One at day care, one at the office -- should I come in -- and one with the church gang. Lizzy's day care has put together a program of some sort for the parents, which should be insanely cute. They're only three!! I MUST remember the video camera.
We forged out to look for a five-dollar gift for her Secret Santa recipient the other night. Yeah, RIGHT. I'm finding that three is that age where it's difficult to know what to get a kid that they will truly enjoy. If you know they're into a particular thing, then that's easy. But, c'mon -- five bucks. We ended up getting a Bob the Builder tractor thingie for $10. I hope he doesn't already have it. I worry just a wee bit too much about these things. More importantly, I hope Lizzy doesn't do or say something rude if she doesn't like her gift. Urk.

The church Christmas party sounds so cool! A chili cook-off, and a gingerbread house-building contest. What fun!! I'm glad there are minds more (MUCH more) creative than mine at work there. And we're doing a neat charity function before that. Matt's more excited about that than he is about this Christmas party. I guess I shouldn't be surprised by that. (Sorry, sweetie!) I've never really seen this philanthropic side of him before. We talked about trying to find ways -- maybe annual 'traditions' -- to do stuff for others. I mean, there are so SO many possibilities. But sometimes, the day-to-day drudgery of routine can be hard to break out of enough to give, especially if it's in non-monetary ways. Still, obviously worth the effort! And we want to impress upon Lizzy the importance of giving; help foster a sense of meeting others' needs; etc. Wish us luck.

At the work party, we're going to have some wounded war vets visiting from Walter Reed. THAT should be interesting. I'm especially intrigued by this because (here's where I get in trouble) our reporters seem to have been strongly discouraged -- one might say, prevented -- from talking to these guys. Considering the nature of the folks for whom our paper is intended, this seems odd. I'm looking forward to seeing if there's much interaction, if anyone tries to write a story about it, or what. (note my careful omission of any proper nouns here. Heh.)

On Sunday afternoon, Matt is treating Lizzy and me
to a SuperGrover show. (Yes, whatever that is.) We haven't really been to anything like that yet with her, so it should be interesting! The best part about this story is that he initially told me it was a dinner party given by his boss and his good friend. So, did I want to go? I gave a weak "Maybe -- let me think about it." (I'm not so nice sometimes.) He said, ummm, okay... (this was via e-mail)
On our way home that night, he was looking in the back seat at Lizzy's cherubic little face, and said, "I can't stand it any more! I'm horrible at keeping secrets. Here's what we're REALLY doing." He explained that if I thought it was a dinner party, I wouldn't have fed Lizzy, wouldn't have cared if we were on time, and generally would have been grumpy about the whole enterprise. Which is all true.
It's nice to be with someone who knows you, but a bit uncomfortable sometimes, too, yes? :)

Cool! I just heard that the day care plans to stay open, unless conditions worsen. What a relief.

Wednesday, December 14, 2005

october

You remember? Back when it was fairly warm?



That's Lizzy and Stephanie, one of her newer best friends at day care. It's hard to keep up with the Best Friend O' The Day. (but I should point out that Ethan always makes the list these days.)

I LOVE this one:



These are from that day care field trip I mentioned awhile back. To the punkin patch, obviously. The one on which Lizzy was taught (but it doesn't seem to have stuck, thankfully) the "Jingle Bells, Batman Smells" variation.
Speaking of patches:



That's Jack, one of her oldest friends -- they used to fight and lead mini-rebellions as infants in the first day care room, where they'd crawl into the sleeping areas and pull out diapers from underneath the cribs and throw them around. He's a wild one.
Then again, so is she.

more photos

Julie,
Aha! Matt DID dress up, but not that night. He saved his finery (which will look familiar) for a friend's party...




More in a few minutes!

Tuesday, December 13, 2005

better late than never?

It's feast or famine with us technophobes. I've got some pics for y'all. Sorry they're from months ago. And, always, bear in mind that my mom reads this blog, so when the rest of you are thinking to yourselves, "Why in the name of all that isn't boring is Kate relating ANOTHER story/posting ANOTHER blog about that darned kid of hers," just remember that a grandmother can never get enough. (or maybe she can, and is being too kind to say anything.)
So. Some from Halloween -- a trip to Boo at the Zoo -- and, oh, darn. I'm outta time. More later.









'L' is for Lizzy

Yesterday, when we picked up The Lizzard at school, all the kids (these are 3-year-olds) were proudly learning how to make their letters. The smaller ones, like Lizzy, were mastering the first letters in their names. Others had more letters down.
But I've never seen Lizzy draw an actual LETTER before. She does smiley faces, and they are soo precious -- a big circle, of course, and two long lines for eyes, toward the outer edges of the circle, then a big, curvy line, toward the bottom and all the way across the circle, for the mouth. The sweetest little childlike drawings. I have to get her to do one on ACTUAL PAPER, not her doodle pad thingie, so I can keep it for posterity. She is so precious.
She's calling me "mama" for some reason these days. And she does it kind of coyly, as if she knows it's a pet name. She's just been a charmer for the past week or so. *sigh* It WAS great to have a three-day weekend with her.

I'd like to say more about the weekend, but I can't for a certain reason. Nothing exciting. Just would spoil a Christmas present surprise. Not that that person doesn't already probably suspect what it is. Anyway, suffice to say, we had a good weekend.

------


It's the time of year when I get ACTUAL MAIL. It's so exciting! I'm capitulating this year, and (in theory -- the task hasn't yet been accomplished) writing a form letter to all. I figure, better they get something than nothing, as many got (or didn't get) last year. And also, if I'm being honest, it might be nice if the recipients could actually decipher what I wrote. But since my handwriting has regressed to the point of chicken scratch, it's best for all that I type something out.

So far, I've gotten four Christmas cards and/or letters. Yay! Yesterday's was from my dear friends Kat and John, some of the sweetest, most lovely, gracious, fun people you will (or won't) ever meet. They moved back to London (they're English) this year, and left us their car. Which they had taken METICULOUS care of in the four years they were here. Thanks, Kat and John! It's still purring like a kitten.
They're the kinds of people who invite the "orphans" over for Christmas, and cook a huge roast with roast potatoes and three veggies on the side and desserts that you pour alcohol over and then light on fire, and THEN make sure that you have several gifts AND A STOCKING to open besides. They're the kind of people who are actually sad when I show up without a then-toddler in tow. (Oh, wait. That's most everybody I know... Because you are ALL special people, as it turns out!)

I love getting these letters because they remind me of a few things: First, that I know some really amazing people. That I have been blessed by the company of some very special folks over the years. These letters also remind me of who and where I have been, and therefore who I am.

The first letter I got was from a very dear high school friend, Lisa, and I enjoyed every bit of it. Her husband served in Iraq for a year, and he returned in early 2005. So her letter was very thankful, and full of anecdotes about her three boys (bless her), and very fun to read. I love seeing how we've grown, in many ways, learning the same lessons, even though we've lived so far apart for so long now and had such different experiences.

The second was from my one-time boss and his wife, who showed me around and helped me adjust when I was in Germany. The wife, Kathy, was a fun lady who encouraged me to join the church choir, thus throwing me into the path of Germans, great classical music, and some wonderful memories. As well as countless rides, advice and other invaluable lessons, such as the admonition to weigh your fruit before you buy it at a German market. You might never be seen from again otherwise. Germans take their rules VERRRY seriously. Alles in ordnung, Ja!

The third was a card from a gal I used to work with here in D.C., who just had a baby and is holding her own quite well, despite the fact that her husband is a surgical resident and therefore pretty much never around. And the fourth, as I said, from Kat and John. I wish I could link to a blog, so those of you who don't know them could get more of a flavor of who they are, but THEY DON'T HAVE ONE, to my knowledge. (if you're reading this, K and J, consider that a hint!!)
I love my friends.

I'm reminded that my everyday life here, which can feel, hm, not lonely, but just so DIFFERENT from the more social way I used to live, is a phase. And a precious phase at that. How often will I have a little girl who calls me "mama" and draws funny, lopsided smiley faces and hugs me tightly around the neck? Not very often, I suspect.

Oh, and Erin -- you want me to link to your blog? As if my friends don't already know you? OKAY. There's an off chance they don't know Julie, so I'll do that as well. I'm so pleased that the world now gets to benefit from your collective wackiness. Julie, I can't wait to hear the Jane song performed live.

Thursday, December 08, 2005

let it snow

This time of year is treacherous for us for reasons beyond those typically brought by inclement weather: When Arlington county schools close, Lizzy's day care closes, and Matt and I have to thumb-wrestle to decide who stays home with her. When you combine that with the days she is actually ill, it's much like we're each cashing in a week of vacation per year for these purposes. So it goes if you choose to both work and have your kid in day care, I suppose.
So, usually -- as happened Monday night -- I am nervously fretting and shaking my fist at the sky when a large (for D.C.) dump of snow is expected.
But today, no. I welcome it. How great would a three-day weekend be! I think I'm a little tired of the holiday rush, and didn't take any time off at Thanksgiving. Time to sit home and work on Christmas gifts ... time to get a little sleep ... time to chase Lizzy around and threaten her with spankings if she grabs chocolate chip cookies after being expressly told three times that she wasn't allowed to have another one. What a rascal. ... She cried far more last night at the news that she'd be getting a spanking for disobeying than she did from the punishment's execution. Heh. Maybe it's because I can't help grabbing her and hugging her tightly right afterwards. I always feel so bad.

On another note: Two friends whom, despite their relative proximity, I rarely get to see, have started blogs this week. Which I think is soooo very cool. I love the chance to peek in on my friends' lives without, you know, the hassle of actually having contact with them. Okay, I was MOSTLY kidding there. But, you know what I mean. A little cyber-contact is SO much better than none.

I'll end with a random question I was pondering this morning: Why do many cough syrups include alcohol? What does the alcohol possibly do for you? Because, despite the fact that I occasionally imbibe, I CANNOT STAND those cough medicines. It gives me yukky shivers just to think about drinking some.
Anyone know?

Tuesday, December 06, 2005

in defense of German consumerism

I really shouldn't even attempt this subject because I am so woefully ignorant of economies, social structures, etc. But I've been thinking about what Brickdude observed last week, and I have to toss in my two Euro cents.

I'm not sure what the attitude about Christmas was in Germany, in terms of orgy of gift-giving. It sure feels out of control here. I keep thinking about what the money I'm spending could buy for someone who was actually in need ... but I digress.
I do, however, remember the things that affected me. Namely, convenience. I lived in Germany from 1997/'99 -- 19 months -- when I first worked for Stars and Stripes. I had a "TOOM Markt" just up the street from my hotel room. It's a grocery/assorted other stuff store. Multipurpose, but mostly groceries. Rather fascinating to wander around and learn the names of fruits, wonder about the contents of most of the cans and boxes on the shelves, and buy a mystery cheese that could later be heated over bread in the company microwave, but since it was stinky cheese, as it turns out, the entire office would reek for hours. Good times!
But don't try to get through the doors of TOOM after, oh, 7:55. Perhaps even earlier. Because that baby closed at 2000 sharp (8 p.m.), and woe to you if you kept those Groceryfrau there past hours. TOOM also closed in midafternoon on Saturday, and all day Sunday. Don't ask me when two-income families ever shopped. Probably on their many, many national holidays (many of them religious occasion-based). Or on their way home?
So, occasionally, I'd be baking or cooking something after work -- I worked from noon to 8 just down the street from TOOM and the motel suite in which I lived -- and I'd think, "Schize!" (joke. I probably said 'drat' or something) "Drat! I need another egg!" Also -- I had one of those teensy-tiny fridges, about the size of Mike and Stacy's currently, that could hold, oh, a half-bag of groceries or so. Stocking up on most things wasn't an option.
Could I run down to the German equivalent of a 7-11? Nope. Actually, I think these types of things did exist -- gas stations, anyway, with convenience stores -- but only closer to downtown. Not where most people actually LIVED. And I doubt they sold eggs. Probably lots of beer, though.
Oh, and Germans also seemed to make things from scratch a lot. To buy their produce and bread daily. Ahhh, the bakeries! I miss the Bakerei.
My point in all this is, Germans might shop a lot. Or they might not. There are many shops, of this we have no doubt. But I liked their priorities. They were very set on being home with their families, or on holiday, or just generally AWAY FROM WORK now and then. Oh, and they also took a half-day off on Friday afternoons. This was annoying and inconvenient to those of us who expect someone to be there to sell us stuff at any time of day or night, but I imagine I could have adjusted and thrived in those conditions, had I stayed for longer. It's worth sacrificing something to allow everyone to have lives once in awhile.
What does this work ethic mean for their economy? I have no idea. Maybe America would crumble into dust if we did the same. But I've always said -- please don't throw anything at me for this -- that it might be better if America was a wee bit weaker, anyway.
Feel free, though, in a non-throwing-things way, to set me straight if you see differently.

Oh, and, side note -- they did NOT have Starbucks over there yet. They had some really tasty German coffee, which I realized after about half my stay had elapsed, but you could not get it in a takeaway-type cup. You had to stay and sip it there in their little cafe. Which was quite lovely, unless you were unused to doing things that way. Investing time in your little coffee moment.
It always reminds me of Europe now, when I take the time to sit in -- or on the sidewalk outside of -- a coffee place. Especially if it's morning. It makes me want to pick up my little travel book and go hunt down and take pictures of cool stuff.

It's nice when someday is now

I've composed several blog entries in my head on various topics, but haven't taken the opportunity to type them. Oh, well. I'll do my best to catch up.

This Sunday, Matt and Lizzy and I went out and got a tree. No big glamorous trip, mind you -- we were variously busy until about 4:30, so we caught the last bit of daylight and drove the four blocks to K-mart and picked out a tree in about 90 seconds from the good fellows who were freezing their tushies off so we could pay an exorbitant amount for a tree. I'm the one insisting on a "real" tree; my parents always had one, and I love the way it smells and feels and looks. But I'm not a fan of fake flowers, either. I guess I want the real thing, or nothing, in this respect.
So we got our tree, and went to Lowe's and got some lights. Matt thought we'd have to buy a bunch of ornaments until I showed him the boxes I had collected from my half-dozen trips to Rothenburg while I lived in Germany. You can't beat Kathe Wohlfahrt for nice, affordable tree bling. Even he decided that my outrageous collection was enough. Augmented by a few Hallmark ornaments we'd already picked out ... My Captain Jean-Luc Picard ornament needed an abominable snowman (with real fuzz!) to keep him company. And no tree would be complete without the merry five (including Toto) from the Wizard of Oz skipping down the green fir branch. I guess.

The putting up of the tree went surprisingly quickly and painlessly -- probably because I was not involved in the logistical elements -- and when it came time to put on the ornaments, Matt's mom and brother dropped by as if by magic. Seriously, we enjoyed sharing the moment with them. They oohed and aahed over the ornaments, and helped us find just the right spots on the tree, a task that became increasingly difficult. Lizzy took the job very seriously, trotting carefully from the ornament-strewn table to the lower branches of the tree to lovingly relocate anything she could get her hands on. If you come to our house while our tree is up, she will warn you that the watermelon slice ornament is not actually meant to be eaten; just to be admired. So be careful!

Then we turned off all the interior lights, and turned on the tree lights, and sat and admired our perfect tree. I had never bothered to get myself a tree when I was on my own; too much expense and trouble. Those hundred-odd ornaments, collected about seven years ago, could wait until I had someone else to share them with. And now I do.

Friday, December 02, 2005

death becomes her

In the same conversational vein as the last post:
The next one, looming so close I can feel its stinky breath on my shoulder, is a conversation about death. And, while I can make up some odd way to deal with the "Why"s -- I love the advice and anecdotes on that one! -- I have NO IDEA how to deal with this weird subject.
The reason I think it will come up soon is because the most recent accursed obsession is The Lion King. And, lemme tell you, there's a lot of death going on there. Most importantly, the death of Simba's father. Ugh.
She hasn't asked yet. But I'm worried. "They fall asleep, and don't wake up"? That can't be good. She'll be even more loath to fall asleep than she is already. I can tell her about heaven, I suppose... but, yikes. Not yet, please.

Any ideas?

I don't really remember my first discussions with my parents about death and dying, but I do vividly remember (as does my mom) telling her that when she and dad died, I would put Band-Aids on them and lie them out in the grass in the backyard. Which was to say, I would take care of them. I would care.
I clearly didn't get it, and my mom thought it was super creepy. She wasn't very reassured.

Wednesday, November 30, 2005

The eternal question

With a slight apology to my friend Sonja, who had life's big unanswerable question recently:

Why?
(that being the eternal question of which I speak.)

I suppose we all pretty much come into parenthood without having previously been a parent. Some have more practice than others. I had pretty much none. I had a couple of nieces by then, but really didn't have much hands-on experience with the very young. I've have/had a couple of stages of development to dread, or look forward to, or both at once, in my mind. I didn't know if the stereotypical stories would ring true with my daughter, but some experiences seem to relate to all. Certain aspects of potty training, for instance. Or how exhausting it is when your child starts trying to learn how to walk. Or the horrors of colic. Or whether breastfeeding would be hard, easy, enjoyable, hellish. Just junk like that.
One stage that I sensed growing close, that I both look forward to and dread even now, is the "Why?" And yesterday, we reached it.

I took Lizzy to the doc. She had a crusty ear, no big deal. Nothing unusual for her, and nothing that yet ANOTHER round of antibiotics can't fix. (what the heck did people do before antibiotics? And what will we do AFTER antibiotics? I shudder to think.) On our way back to day care, she started yawning. She HATES naps and going to sleep. And also hates waking up. She's basically a teenager already, in that respect.

I said, "Lizzy! are you tired?" "No," she predictably answered.
"Well, are you hungry?" "Yes."
"You know what will happen as soon as we get to school? You'll have lunch and a nap."
"Why?" (me -- '!!!!!' IT BEGINS.)
"Well, you're yawning because you're tired. That means you need a nap."
"Why?"
"Well, a nap makes you feel better. You won't be tired when you wake up."
"Why do I hafta take a nap?"
"Because you're tired."
"Why am I tired?"
"Because you need a nap."

We went back and forth about three or four times before she gave up. So the circular argument gives Mom the round-one victory!

Does this go against the principle of Ephesians 6:4?

Monday, November 28, 2005

I feel for you -- I think I love you

Now you just know I'm feeling silly with a title like that!

I don't have time to do a "proper" entry that adequately runs down the craziness that was the Thanksgiving "weekend" (during which I technically had my normal two-day weekend, which made it even crazier) , so I will leave you wanting more with a mere list of things that I need to blog about later. And a prayer request.

-- 5-k 'Turkey Trot' on Thanksgiving morning
-- Thanksgiving with the 'in-laws'
-- Visit and stay of one of said in-laws
-- Panic and subsequent frantic shopping, and subsequent forgetting of friend's birthday party, when realization that dress for upcoming wedding was left at dry cleaners, and dry cleaners was closed through weekend
-- Wedding
-- Last-minute (and, I kid you not on that part) decision to attend Matt's 10-year class reunion, and said reunion itself
-- Subsequent hangover of Matt, resulting in me watching Lizzy ALL BY MYSELF on churchless Sunday morn. Boo hoo! (well, that might be all I have to say about that one, actually)
-- Scary scary Lizzy choking incident Sunday night -- first we've ever had of its kind -- resulting in us both falling down and praising God, in our own ways, for our daughter and our mightily blessed lives.
Lizzy really didn't like being smacked on the back. That was the funniest part of that incident. In retrospect, of course. Not much was funny about it at the time ... she was really shocked that Daddy "hit" her. (in a non-spanking way, because we do spank her occasionally) Poor Daddy, who might have just saved her life, was left trying to explain to the shocked and shaken three-year-old that it was for her own good...

And the prayer request. Most of those who read this blog already know about this, or have posted their own prayer requests on this matter. But for those who don't already know (hm, Jayster and my mom, I guess?), please, please remember my dear friends Mike and Stacy in your prayers. They're about three months pregnant with twins, and it's the most blessed event ever -- take my word for it -- and they will make the best parents in the history of mankind, and they're having a scary week. Some bad, scary signs and complications.
Please beg God that He will allow these precious lives to join us here on this earth, in five or six months, when it would be a good time. Because we all want to know them, and there are many, many lives that will be blessed by them. So please, God. If there is any way to let this happen. As Stacy's brother once said, a long time ago, in regards to another life-or-death situation ... all we can do is ask You.
So, please.

Wednesday, November 23, 2005

making it all worthwhile

As you might have inferred, I have been more frustrated than usual with Lizzy lately -- she seems to be engaging in extreme psychological warfare, and I just don't feel up to the task a lot of the time. And yet, I don't want to raise a pathologically manipulative monster. We women are good enough at that at times without being raised to be that way.

For instance, last night -- and again, I am to blame for allowing her to get away with this -- she wanted 'warm' milk. She used to want 'hot' milk before bedtime. Now it must be 'warm.' So, I adjust the seconds in the microwave accordingly. But last night, it wasn't the right warmth. It was too hot. So I put a wee bit of cold water in it. Still too hot. More cold water. Now it's too cold. A bit of hot water. (it was probably pretty gross by then, just from being watered down.) Now too hot... You get the point. After about the sixth adjustment, I said, "Lizzy, are you just playing with me? Trying to see what you can get away with?" "Yes," she said, and giggled. And then had the gall to say, "this milk is too cold!"
We'll have to work on that one. Or NOT work on it, rather.

I have to tell you what happened this morning, when I dropped her off at day care. It really made my month. The kiddos in Lizzy’s class made ‘Happy Thanksgiving’ cards for the parents with their handprints on the front that look like a turkey. (they were in their cubby shelves, waiting for us to take them home tonight.) The kids and teachers did a really good job, with a different color of paint on each turkey feather (finger). Inside, the teachers appear to have had the kids tell them what they were thankful for, so they could write it in for each kid. Lizzy's bright, but she's not quite writing yet...
Lizzy’s says, "I’m thankful for my mommy and daddy." I thought, oh, that’s nice. But I bet this is just what the teachers came up with. Then I looked at a card in the kid’s cubby next to Lizzy’s. It says, “I’m thankful for Legos.”

So she really DID say that! She is SUCH a doll.

If I don't get a chance to post again today, have a happy Thanksgiving, everyone (my friends and family). I am so grateful for you all -- especially this new church body. You have been such a blessing to me this year. I really appreciate you, and thank God for you daily. May your holiday be a blessed one.

Monday, November 21, 2005

Potty (not in a Lizzy-related way, for once)

I'm not in a good mood today. It's not a depressed mood; more of a "really annoyed with someone who saw fit to lecture me this morning on something that felt unfair" mood.
Sorry. The right to privacy act prevents me from revealing more.
Suffice to say, I'm sitting in that first flush of anger that makes you feel so good, so entitled, while you're in it, but in the wiser, back part of your mind -- where the still, small voice lives, the one that you're not listening to, yayayaaaaayoucan'tmakeme -- you know you will feel really bad about it all later, and that you're just compounding things by sitting and rolling around in the anger and self-vindication and stuff.
That's where I am today.
And my virtual father-in-law's coming to town this week and staying with us. So that will be loads of jolliness to which I am not so much looking forward.

So -- in a highly impersonal, obviously deflecting way -- who saw the latest Harry Potter movie this weekend?

(WARNING: If there is someone out there who doesn't want to know what's in the movie -- not that I give away anything, or, for that matter, that anything conclusive actually HAPPENED -- or if you don't care in the slightest bit about HP, or my opinion on such -- you might want to quit reading now.)

What did y'all think? I'm tempted not to put my thoughts here first, so that you can give me an uncolored response.
But, because it's my blog, and I'll cry if I wanna:

As those of you who care might recall, I don't read the books, but probably will someday. This is fueled mainly by a combo of 'annoyed that I didn't write them first,' 'not a lot of free time these days' and 'insistence that Jo Rowling will not have the power to make me salivate over the release of her next book.' But, I'm fascinated by the phenomenon in general. And, though I'm completely annoyed by her borrowing from here, there and everywhere under the sun, she does mix it up well and serve it in a delicious way, with bonus points for presentation. Or so it would appear from all I see in the movies and hear from those who HAVE read the books.

I found the movie the least 'fun' of the four so far. I think it has a lot to do with the growing length of the books, thus more to squish into a 2 1/2-hour moviegoing experience. I thought the cinematography was the least fun, the magic was the least visible, and I do not give two figs about Voldemort, so that didn't do anything for me. (I'm definitely not a true fan, yes, as I said.) The kids going through puberty angst -- eh. *shrug* I've never been into teen angsty plots. (hated Judy Blume as a kid.) And there was so much that was thrown in there haphazardly, for lack of time to explain and flesh out, and which left the book-uninitiated feeling very disconcerted. The jumps from scene to scene were very disjointed. Etc. Important lines were tossed in without much emphasis put on them. And much, much made no sense -- I hear it made a lot more sense in the book.
The Myrtle ghost chick stuff? Ew. Ew ew EW. (loved how a Star Trek IV plot made its way into that scene, also. Tres original, Jo.)
This maze business? Totally boring, because it sounds like they cut out almost all fun and explanation thereof.
The dragons? We have no idea (I hear you do in the book) what happened to the previous three 'champions' (and how are you a champion if you haven't won anything yet, exactly?), except that they made it on to the next bit. Those are the parts that are the fun viewing. Not so much stupid Voldemort scenes that actually AREN'T in the book. Oh, and how about how it was Christmas, oooh! And now school's over. Write to me, won't you boys?
And the dance. So, these two 17-year-old boys asked a 14- and 15-year-old? Hm, shortage of older girls there at Hogwarts? Gross.
In the water competition portion: Would that girl have died if Harry hadn't saved her? Who knows. Why did Fleur delaCoeur get to move on to the next one even though she failed? Because, I thought we were told during the first competition that if you fail, you're out.
Yeah, yeah, it's all been explained to me. By one who read the books. But that shouldn't have had to happen, if the movie was GOOD. It should have stood on its own.
Hm. Maybe I liked it even less than I thought I did.
ANY Harry Potter movie is worth seeing, and fun viewing, in my opinion. But I had myriad issues with these.

As always, please, please, PLEASEPLEASEPLEASE feel free to disagree. We'd have a boring time if you didn't. I guess my main point here is that, in the past, it feels like Potter movies have been the most fun for those who had no expectations, and little knowledge of, the books. (Me.) But this one was the opposite way. And as a result, I am bummed. I heard from all and sundry that it was really great. Well, it wasn't -- not to me.
I wish we would go back to the days of the intermission. Make a four-hour movie, if the book warrants it! And have a 20-minute intermission. And, for everyone's sake, please actually clean the bathrooms -- including the re-stocking of toilet paper -- and sweep the theater floors between showings. Thanks.

Friday, November 18, 2005

Question(s) O' the Day

Here at Stars and Stripes -- the features section, specifically -- we run, in our weekly Scene magazine, a question of the week. I might have mentioned this before, but I'm hard of remembering.
In lieu of anything interesting to talk about today, I'd like to open it up to the audience. Here's a feedback question I think I'll ask our boys (and gals) overseas next time I'm making up a list of queries:

Have you ever had a vanity plate? If so, what was it?

And, if you were to create one now, what would it be?

I have not ever had one (expensive in Washington state, and I've been too lazy since I've been here), but I'll out Matt. He had one on his first car, in high school. It was "CUREFAN"
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

(in case I didn't make it clear, please answer the questions yourself!)

Wednesday, November 16, 2005

Random shots fired today at Linusletters

These things individually aren't that worthy of mention, but because -- hey! -- my life's rather boring these days, I'll put 'em down for lack of anything better to do. (I LOVE Wed. afternoons! We've sent our weekly magazine, and I'm left to, um, get right to work on the next one. Or, alternatively, surf televisionwithoutpity.com, or my friends' blogs, or local real estate, or whatever.)

This morning, as I got on the metro and positioned myself -- you know, staked out my territory; not too far inside the door (by the time I get on the metro, at Rosslyn, there's either no need to pack into the middle, or folks already are packed in) and usually standing -- another guy got on and leaned on the pole in front of me. Which, as you metro veterans know, is quite rude when there are others standing and needing to grasp poles. Sometimes, when I feel like messing with people, the passive-aggressive maneuvers are best. So I rammed my fingers -- seriously, as gently as possible -- around the pole. So he was then leaning on my fingers. Occasionally, at stops, I would remove my hand in order to turn a page of the newspaper I was holding with the other hand. Then I'd repeat the hand replacement procedure. It was hilarious, how we were both pretending to completely ignore the other, holding our ground. I was so into it that I missed my stop and got out one past where I usually do.

Mike's toy dog in Home Depot comments reminded me of something that came to my attention today that has to be one of the biggest wastes of money, EVER. Now, for the record, I think iPods and their ilk are pretty cool. I don't own one, but mostly because I don't want to bother with it, and I generally like to hear what's going on around me far more than creating my own little bubble of "MY!" music. But, I bear personal music-type people no ill will. It's all good.
And, those wee outfits now being sold for your iPod to wear -- though cute -- might, just might, be going too far.



However, in my humble estimation, this is going waaaay too far...
Yes, my friends, this is an iDog. It comes in different colors -- white or black -- for "YOUR!" unique expression. So, when your iPod gets tired of its wee, precious outfits, you can put it on this toy robot dog, which will then dance, bark, do your dishes, whatever to the beat of your tuneage.
Does he look cold to you? Why, cover him up with an outfit of his very own! It comes in pink, purple or black! (I wonder why these outfits seem to be skewed to women... hmmm... Don't they think the menfolk will be rushing to this product?
And, if you grow weary of watching the tiny, trendily clothed mutt boogie-woogie, and wish (ye gads!) to transport him somewhere -- Home Depot, perhaps? -- you can put him in this.



So you see, Mike, it really, really could be worse.
Or -- would this give you MORE cred at Home Depot?
It just amazes me what people will waste money on.

So, with irony not lost on me, on to my third point -- how much money I freely give to Starbucks for a product that probably costs them about 13 cents to produce...

My dentist is awesome. When I refer new customers to him, he gives me stuff! The first time, it was four free movie tickets. This time (which was Lizzy -- c'mon! Like I deserve something for THAT), he gave me a $20 Starbucks card! It's been two coffees a day ever since. WOO! WOO! WOO!!! He must know me rather well. Next, it'll be a coffee table book about travels in Europe, perhaps, or scrapbooking supply vouchers, or free stuff at Barnes and Noble ... Ahhhh, I'm so easy. ;)

Monday, November 14, 2005

where am I?

I missed church yesterday for the third week in a row ... at this point in my life, I need that weekly dose of community and spirituality and meditation and worship so badly. Also for the third week in a row, I spent Saturday night with folks of Matt's acquaintance. This 'do was less "party" and more casual get-together, for which I was thankful. A friend of his is trying to get a monthly potluck deal going, which is a neat idea. It's not that his friends are so terrible (despite what I sometimes say -- they're just not generally into what I'm into); it's just that it makes me rather bitter sometimes that I can't see my friends, new and old, more. It's kind of like how Matt's mom is really bonding with Lizzy these days. I look at that and I think, hey, I want you to know my mom like that. Not as some distant person you see once or twice a year. It makes me so sad.

Last weekend, Matt and I both felt under the weather come Sunday morn, and yesterday, I was so excited at the prospect of going to church. So was Lizzy. She referred to her bestest church friend, Ethan, in the past tense recently, and I thought (and said), No, Lizzy! He IS your friend! (sheesh. We really need to get to church for my sake AND hers.) So, we were all set to go -- ON TIME, no less -- and ten minutes before we were set to leave, Lizzy throws up. And, for no apparent reason. She was fine the rest of the day, and eventually ate normal foods, even. (though she did take an extra-long nap.) The timing was so uncanny, I couldn't believe it. Was I not meant to go to church?

And, this just happened to be the one weekend, ever, that Matt made plans with his friends at the exact same time as church. We were already trying to formulate a plan as of how to do this with our one car. So, it suddenly came down to, decide in 10 minutes or less, he or I would have to stay home with an apparently sick Lizzy ... What do y'all do in these situations? When one of you gets to go to church or work, and the other has to stay home?

I needed to go to church SO badly. But, I thought, how weirdly selfish is it of me to insist he cancel his plans so that I can go to CHURCH? And, I know, God doesn't live at church (or the coffee shop). He lives where we are. Though, it's so hard to make myself sit down and pray and talk to Him these days. I always want to take a nap or read a book instead. Because those Lizzyless, dutyless moments are painfully rare. So church usually is the only "fix" I get. And, as I mentioned before, I really miss my friends...

So, there's no tidy wrap-up to this post. I guess I wanted to say, Hey, I really miss you guys. I hope things are going well for all of you. And, though it's no substitute, if there's anything that hit you from yesterday's service, or if you want to give me a little run-down on what happened, I would LOVE to read about it.

Seriously.

Friday, November 11, 2005

Photo Friday

Maybe this isn't so funny without the context. Or maybe I am seriously deranged. (you may vote in the comments section, if you like.)
I'll try to re-create the moment in which I first saw it: I'm compiling a car-care package -- not writing it, but laying out the pages and editing it -- for the magazine this week. So my co-workers and I were digging around for stuff to illustrate it, since we don't always (or ever) get the most stellar art possibilities to go along with the stories we're sent. I'd go into more detail about the ins and outs of how my job works, but I want to attempt to entertain, not put you all into comas. Anyway. My boss, Brian, and my cube neighbor, Danielle, were sending me art possibilities. Serious ones. Then my boss sends me this one, with the message line, "possible car care art."





(note plastic limbs in foreground)


A good laugh at work is a good thing! Makes me feel like I'm getting away with something, if I have jolly moments while I'm getting paid to be here.

In other, not very interesting news: Our on-again, off-again (mostly off-again) maintenance guy got most of the pretty done on the front of the house on Tuesday! And he's back again today, Matt tells me, finishing up! Except the painting, I guess. That two months he disappeared from sight took up all the prime paintin' time. And the prime primin' time. Heh heh. (a little homeowner humor there)

And, it was 59 degrees when I left the house today. Big deal, you say? IN THE HOUSE. We might as well unplug the fridge -- we could leave stuff out on the kitchen counter and it would be juuuust fine. Oh, except the frozen stuff. So far.

Our furnace hasn't been working all week. I hesitate to say it's broken, because I don't KNOW that it's broken, and thus would cost untold riches to repair. Ahhh, yes. But no matter how much that house costs to maintain, when I think about my apartment neighbor from Hades and the paper-thin walls in the building I was just in (no offense, Mike! It was a good deal at the time, for awhile!), I know it's all worthwhile.

We'll have to have some sort of party so you can all come admire the newly beautified home. And so most of you can see where I live, for cryin' out loud. When did I become so antisocial?

Thursday, November 10, 2005

poetry Thursday

Maggie has inspired me by posting a couple of my favorite poems, so I thought I'd beat her to this one, which Sonja says was big in her family when she was growing up, too! It's got huskies in it, so surely Maggie's a fan. :)

This is for my dad, who did his best (and largely succeeded) in instilling in me an appreciation for poetry. I'm not sure if the seeds fell on fertile soil with my brother; I'll have to ask. This poem uniquely reminds me of Dad because his mom moved from Tennessee to Ketchikan, Alaska, to teach, then met and married his father there. Dad spent his summers, and his senior year of high school, in Tennessee or thereabouts. Now he (and Mom) are back in Alaska, but in Anchorage. So he can fully appreciate the various sentiments in the poem.


The Cremation of Sam McGee
by Robert W. Service

There are strange things done in the midnight sun
By the men who moil for gold;
The Arctic trails have their secret tales
That would make your blood run cold;
The Northern Lights have seen queer sights,
But the queerest they ever did see
Was that night on the marge of Lake Lebarge
I cremated Sam McGee.

Now Sam McGee was from Tennessee,
Where the cotton blooms and blows.
Why he left his home in the South to roam
'Round the Pole, God only knows.
He was always cold, but the land of gold
Seemed to hold him like a spell;
Though he'd often say in his homely way
That he'd "sooner live in hell".

On a Christmas Day we were mushing our way
Over the Dawson trail.
Talk of your cold! through the parka's fold
It stabbed like a driven nail.
If our eyes we'd close, then the lashes froze
Till sometimes we couldn't see;
It wasn't much fun, but the only one
To whimper was Sam McGee.

And that very night, as we lay packed tight
In our robes beneath the snow,
And the dogs were fed, and the stars o'erhead
Were dancing heel and toe,
He turned to me, and "Cap," says he,"I
'll cash in this trip, I guess;
And if I do, I'm asking that you
Won't refuse my last request."

Well, he seemed so low that I couldn't say no;
Then he says with a sort of moan:
"It's the cursed cold, and it's got right hold
Till I'm chilled clean through to the bone.
Yet 'tain't being dead -- it's my awful dread
Of the icy grave that pains;
So I want you to swear that, foul or fair,
You'll cremate my last remains."

A pal's last need is a thing to heed,
So I swore I would not fail;
And we started on at the streak of dawn;
But God! he looked ghastly pale.
He crouched on the sleigh, and he raved all day
Of his home in Tennessee;
And before nightfall a corpse was all
That was left of Sam McGee.

There wasn't a breath in that land of death,
And I hurried, horror-driven,
With a corpse half hid that I couldn't get rid,
Because of a promise given;
It was lashed to the sleigh, and it seemed to say:
"You may tax your brawn and brains,
But you promised true, and it's up to you
To cremate those last remains."

Now a promise made is a debt unpaid,
And the trail has its own stern code.
In the days to come, though my lips were dumb,
In my heart how I cursed that load.
In the long, long night, by the lone firelight,
While the huskies, round in a ring,
Howled out their woes to the homeless snows --
O God! how I loathed the thing.

And every day that quiet clay
Seemed to heavy and heavier grow;
And on I went, though the dogs were spent
And the grub was getting low;
The trail was bad, and I felt half mad,
But I swore I would not give in;
And I'd often sing to the hateful thing,
And it hearkened with a grin.

Till I came to the marge of Lake Lebarge,
And a derelict there lay;
It was jammed in the ice, but I saw in a trice
It was called the "Alice May".
And I looked at it, and I thought a bit,
And I looked at my frozen chum;
Then "Here," said I, with a sudden cry,
"Is my cre-ma-tor-eum."

Some planks I tore from the cabin floor,
And I lit the boiler fire;
Some coal I found that was lying around,
And I heaped the fuel higher;
The flames just soared, and the furnace roared --
Such a blaze you seldom see;
And I burrowed a hole in the glowing coal,
And I stuffed in Sam McGee.

Then I made a hike, for I didn't like
To hear him sizzle so;
And the heavens scowled, and the huskies howled,
And the wind began to blow.
It was icy cold, but the hot sweat rolled
Down my cheeks, and I don't know why;
And the greasy smoke in an inky cloak
Went streaking down the sky.

I do not know how long in the snow
I wrestled with grisly fear;
But the stars came out and they danced about
Ere again I ventured near;
I was sick with dread, but I bravely said:
"I'll just take a peep inside.
I guess he's cooked, and it's time I looked";
. . .Then the door I opened wide.

And there sat Sam, looking cool and calm,
In the heart of the furnace roar;
And he wore a smile you could see a mile,
And he said: "Please close that door.
It's fine in here, but I greatly fear
You'll let in the cold and storm --
Since I left Plumtree, down in Tennessee,
It's the first time I've been warm."

There are strange things done in the midnight sun
By the men who moil for gold;
The Arctic trails have their secret tales
That would make your blood run cold;
The Northern Lights have seen queer sights,
But the queerest they ever did see
Was that night on the marge of Lake Lebarge
I cremated Sam McGee.

(Mom, what's your favorite poem? Maybe I'll run it next week.)

Monday, November 07, 2005

Three years ago today ...

We met this little girl for the first time.




It's amazing, isn't it, what can happen in three years. In her, and in all of us.

A few years ago, I couldn't imagine being in this situation. I didn't think it would work, or be good. But now I can't imagine being with any other two people... God can redeem anything.

So today, I packed Lizzy off to day care with cupcakes (chocolate with green, frosting, as requested), Cinderella cupcake toppers (and SpongeBob and Spider-Man for the boys), and birthday hats, napkins, plates, etc., for a little impromptu party there. (the cheap parents' way out.) I had so many things to remember! And I remembered them ALL. Except...
Her shoes. Lizzy has to borrow extras from the day care today -- thank goodness they have extras! -- because her mom forgot HER SHOES.

Thanks to everybody -- especially my parents, and Matt's parents (who blessedly don't read this blog), and Mike and Stacy -- for helping us get this far. We love you guys.
And thanks to Ms. Stacy, mommy-to-be, for the above photo, as well. Without her, we would have zero photographic record that the event happened. Not that I am likely to forget it. One might forget shoes, but never, never labor pains.)

And we survived the terrible twos! (victory dance) Our daughter will be a mature little angel from now on, right? Right, Mom? Right, Sonja? . ...


*crickets chirping*

my job is now obsolete

Eh. An interesting forwarded message:

I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulacltyuesdnatnrd waht I was rdgnieg. Thephaonmneal pweor of the hmuan mnid Aoccdrnig to rscheearch at CmabrigdeUinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr theltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. Amzanig huh?

Wednesday, November 02, 2005

this morning

Scene: The dining room. Lizzy's eating a bowl of cereal, after sitting and waiting for it to get 'soggy.' Matt sits at table, putting on shoes and socks. Kate stands in doorway. Matt and Kate seem a bit agitated, as they are a good half-hour late. Lizzy lingers over her meal.

KATE: (kisses Lizzy on newly, and adorably, shorn head)

LIZZY: Don't kiss me!

KATE: Big girls can have kisses! Daddy kisses Mommy sometimes.

LIZZY: But, no. I'm a big girl. I'm not a baby any more. Don't kiss me.
(turns back to cereal)

KATE: (Crumples in sobbing heap)

Well, okay -- not really. Instead, I fantasized about the day I'll have another little baby, and I'll shower its chubby, oblivious little self with kisses, whilst Lizzy clings to my leg, desperate for attention...
WAAHAAHAAAA.

(Dee -- feel free to remind me that that scenario is actually not all that fun! Or, better yet, let me borrow your baby for a bit so I have another little someone to kiss...)

Tuesday, November 01, 2005

Good time to be on the East Coast

This one's for Maggie and Schuyler: (and, wow, does it have a miserable lead-in! Perhaps I should look into editing opportunities at the Trib.)


UW, WSU stumbling toward sour Apple Cup

By DAVE BOLING
Tacoma News Tribune
01-NOV-05

SEATTLE -- To the realization that cleanliness resides nowhere near Godliness, and that ignorance has no direct correlation to bliss, we must now point out that misery, apparently, is oblivious to company.

If the adage held true, then the football fans of Washington and Washington State would be currently delighted, and their suffering would be mitigated by the coinciding afflictions of their rivals.

In case looking at the Pacific-10 Conference standings has ceased to be a tolerable experience for you, I'll save you the hardship of squinting at the agate print: UW and WSU are anchoring the standings with 0-5 records.

The grim mathematics are reaching critical mass, driven by what you might call compounding disinterest. In the last two seasons, the Huskies and Cougars are a combined 3-23 in league games, with UW contributing 13 consecutive defeats.

WSU's overall record of 3-5 seems less distressing on the surface than UW's 1-7. But neither will induce vast alumni contributions as the four combined wins include two that came against Idaho.

The Vandals are 2-6 this season, but if the former members of the old Pacific Coast Conference petitioned for re-inclusion, it would likely gain strong support from the Washington schools.

Comparatively, UW beat Idaho worse (34-6) than did WSU (38-26), but some of the Vandals' key players were injured against the Cougars and didn't play at UW.

Both teams have since lost to common foes California, UCLA and USC.

With only two games remaining before the Apple Cup, it's not too early to examine the possibility that both teams could be winless in the conference going into the annual rivalry game.

The Huskies have the better chance of breaking the streak with Oregon State (4-4) at home this weekend and following up with Arizona (2-6) on the road. The Cougs get two straight home contests against Arizona State (4-4) and Oregon (7-1).

As sports fans, you're probably thinking, "Oh, man, I've got to be at this Apple Cup, whatever the costs, because these teams could be making history in what has been a storied rivalry."

But you might recall, with some nostalgia, the odious Apple Cup of 1969.

Washington, under coach Jim Owens, was disrupted by racial unrest and player discord that season. But as much as anything, the Huskies were doomed by a killer schedule.

For a team that could have used as many Idahos and San Jose States as they could line up, the Huskies, instead, opened at Michigan State and then at Michigan, before playing host to Ohio State.

They ran the table, failing to score more than 14 points in any of the first nine defeats.

The schedule-makers lifted WSU that season, even if it was only a tiny boost. The Cougars opened at Illinois and eked out a 19-18 win for coach Jim Sweeney.

We must point out here that the Flailing Illini finished the 1969 campaign at 0-10. The Cougars' visit to the Corn Belt the next week was less satisfying as they gave up 61 points in a loss to Iowa.

They lost by only a point to Oregon the next week before running off a string of five conference losses in which they scored a total of 24 points.

This pair of juggernauts, both winless in conference play, faced off on Nov. 22 in Seattle. Washington won, 30-21. We'd suggest that somebody had to, but scoreless ties were still a possibility in the pre-overtime days.

For the most part, misery hasn't had much company; from 1990 through 2003, there was only one season (1993, when UW was good enough, but on probation) when one of these two teams didn't get a bowl invitation.

So, what's happened to these programs?

Coaching turnover has been a factor. Bill Doba went 6-2 in conference the first season after Mike Price left for Alabama but has been 3-10 in the conference since. And after Rick Neuheisel was ousted, Keith Gilbertson went 4-4 in the Pac-10 the next season, but the Huskies have lost 13 since.

UW and WSU also receive no more conference gimmes, either. Cal and Oregon State and Stanford are considerably better than they had been during many stretches in the past, and neither Washington school has a win over any of those teams in the past two seasons.

So, as they stumble toward their Nov. 19 showdown at Husky Stadium, the only guarantee is that one team will pick up a conference win. And the misery of this season for both teams will be at a merciful end.

Language, part II

Lizzy and I went to the "pumpkin patch" today, on a field trip with her day care. It's actually a petting zoo in Maryland with a hay ride (sit on bales of hay in back of a tractor, ride around a bumpy course with zero other amusement factor -- just makes you long for Cox Farms) and a few piles of little imported pumpkins to pick through and take home. Or, if you're Lizzy, fling to the ground and play soccer with, or line up in long straight rows, even though you're only supposed to take one each.

It was fine. Rather un-noteworthy. Bizarrely nice and sunny for Nov. 1st. Though the light was too harsh for good photos... just as well. After Lily and John, she has to be one of the most ridiculously over-photographed kids in history. (and Lily and John's photos are much better.) NOT that I'm keeping track. :)

We rode in the day care van with a bunch of other kids and teachers -- I didn't even know they MADE 15-passenger vans! Lizzy was hoppin' in the back, between me and her little friend Jack. Who started off the trip by attempting to teach her a new song:

Jack was trying to teach her the colorful variation on "Jingle Bells." Which went like this: “Jingle Bells, Batman Smells, Robin Laid Away..." And in fact, that is all. The batmobile apparently retained all its wheels. No word on whether the Joker got away.
Jack also didn’t realize that Robin laid an egg. Which, of course, is the whole point to the humor … Kids. Heh. He says he got the rhyme from Madagascar. The movie, I assume.
Lizzy kept trying to repeat it, but kept messing it up in the most comical ways. She would sing, “Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, Jingle all the way,” and Jack would say, “No! You have to say BATMAN SMELLS.” So she would say, “Batman smells, Batman smells…” and he would say, “NO!” (repeat 50 times, with slight variations)

Photos of this and various other outings to be posted, as soon as I get a chance to sit down at home and actually do it.

Monday, October 31, 2005

watch your language

This weekend, I called my dad while Lizzy and I were home alone. She saw me pick up the phone, and said, "I'm going to call Hello Kitty!" She picked up her little toy hello kitty phone and proceeded to repeat everything I said, about a second later, into her toy phone. I'm sure Hello Kitty was confused. Either that, or she was asking the same questions as my dad. It was rather jarring -- like that echo you get sometimes from a bad connection. And, of course, ridiculously cute at the same time.
A little later, we were in the car, with Matt, and Matt was trying (a conversation always involves effort if Lizzy's around) to tell me a story. I've gotten on his case before about how he talks. Which is unfair, but hey -- I'm a copy editor. It's hard sometimes not to try to edit the person you talk to the most. Specifically, he is guilty of the "so he's, like, "Blah blah," and she's like, "Blah blah." Which drives me insane after the fiftieth time, mostly because I will totally pick it up if I hear it all the time. And, well, it's irritating. After he said that a few times, we hear a little voice in the back seat pipe up, "And she's, like, ..." Matt and I turned to each other -- me with a horrified expression, he with a slightly guilty, somewhat alarmed look. oh NO. She can't have the disease, too!

*editor's note -- please don't feel that YOU, gentle reader, have to 'edit yourself' when you talk to me. I want it pointed out that I was NOT one of the people who e-mailed copy editing mistakes they'd caught on the church's Web site... Not that that's a bad thing... I'm just conscious of not coming across as the 'annoyingly anal one.' Even if that is probably in fact exactly what I am. And if we're all anal together, well, good for us! I won't feel as weird.*

We had a reasonably good time at Boo at the Zoo. Probably not a $20 a head great time, though -- perhaps that's one of those things you can do once or twice and call it good. Though, since the money goes to the zoo, and I'm a big fan of the zoo, I can feel a bit better about that part.
Lizzy was adorable, of course! my Evil Queen costume was a big hit, too. Especially at the Whole Foods stand, where they were giving away nice JUICY RED APPLES... Heh heh.
We'll venture out again tonight. I hope it's warmer. And I hope we see a bit of witchery and bionicleness about at some point!
Happy Halloween, y'all.

Friday, October 28, 2005

Mirror, Mirror


I wasn't going to dress up tonight for Boo at the Zoo, but I got a costume I think would go over well (or not) with the kiddos -- the Evil Queen from Snow White. We were looking at costumes last night (when, by the way, we ran into Lady Light and the Lightfamily! In Target! In Manassas! An unexpected treat. It makes me feel so much better to know that perfectly sane, normal people -- stop it, yes they ARE, or if they're not, none of us should be -- are in my town, or near it. Centreville, etc. I'm not as isolated as I sometimes feel), when I saw this costume. Awesome! Total evil, in the guise of a great beauty, at least in her own mind (hm, why is that appealing) ... No hair or close-fitting garments required! That, I do believe, is the biggest attraction of the costume. I hadn't realized somehow, before this year, how difficult it is to find a costume (what, you say? One can be MADE? You've clearly forgotten to whom you are conversing) that doesn't make a grown woman appear, um, sexy. (another word that begins with "S" is actually more apropos, but I'll try to be genteel.) And I can get a good ol' shiny red Washington State apple as a prop. My question now is, is their an inner slut -- ooops, sexy person -- inside all of us chicks, supposedly? Am I missing some kind of boat here? And if I am, I'll happily wave goodbye as it sails on. Men's imaginations are good enough. They don't need this kind of help.
We're cross-pollinating the fairy tale pool here. I hope Disney doesn't mind! (HAHAHAHA -- because he followed the original stories so faithfully...) Hans Christian Anderson, the Bros. Grimm and whoever else has been wronged at the hands of Walt, this one's for you.
I just hope I don't freak out Lizzy too much.

Thursday, October 27, 2005

minutae

Yesterday, I arrived home to a freshly vacuumed house, a newly installed bathroom ceiling fan (which took five hours and entailed a trip to the attic to remove 30-year-old headless nails), empty garbage cans and a hot meatloaf dinner. It's nice to have an occasional house-spouse! Nice to eat dinner before 7:45.

We're trying to get going earlier in the morning these days, particularly since Matt's boss basically said his theoretical promotion next spring hinges on it. Matt says this morning, "This may sound dumb, but I hope that maybe after the time change, I'll have an easier time getting going." I laughed at him. I'm not sure he appreciated it.
I made it into the office at 9:15 today! Nice. (it's usually more like 9:45) Though, it was a hard morning to leave Lizzy at the day care. It's never easy, but some days I feel so much guilt and sadness about kissing that little face goodbye. I wish I could be with her all day... She was just so sweet and chubby-cheeked and clingy. She didn’t cry when I left -- her usual form of protest -- but she lay down on the floor, face-down. It was SO sad. Before that, she looked up at me and simply said, “Don’t go.”

Wednesday, October 26, 2005

weekday update

If any of you prayed about the roof situation, thanks. Our first estimate was that it would cost less than a thousand dollars to repair the hole (one guy said he could see into the attic from his perch atop the roof -- oops), AND remove the solar panels. Sweeeeet. Nothing like your daughter's room becoming a swimming pool to spur you to happily throw cash at repairmen. But, much like Ross said at church on Sunday, I had just about that much, plus a few hundred to get the air vents cleaned out, coming from my annual bonus. So, as always, God is faithful and good!

I don't think I've fully mentioned the strange disappearance of our occasional plumber/handy guy, Rodney. Well, he got us all excited about putting a fancy overhang thingie on the front of our house, over the door, then bought the supplies and put up a couple pieces of plywood and some 2-by-4s, then disappeared. And I mean, for months. We heard nothing. We called and left messages until we felt we were being pests. Then we gave him up for lost.
Matt tried calling him again yesterday, for whatever reason. And HE CALLED BACK. Matt asked him where the heck he had been -- broke his hip, had to take care of some family business in New Orleans, where apparently they have had no cell phone service for months (editorial sarcasm -- I don't think he said that), etc. Matt said, "Well, we have a question. We appear to have a hole in our roof..." Rodney breaks in with, "I KNOW it ain't the roof I built!" Matt's thinking, since when does two pieces of plywood constitute a roof... I will grant, however, that it has been less leaky than our ACTUAL roof this month.

In other non-news, I drove Lizzy into town today and Matt stayed home to greet roof estimator guys. This is slightly tricky because Lizzy needs a fair degree of amusement and attention on our little commutes. First, we couldn't get the CD player working. (trust me -- this would have been a very serious problem, but it must've just needed to warm up.) Then, she kept wanting to show me things she was doing with her toys. Once, I turned around for a second juuust as traffic was braking... And just about squished the angel whose extended arms must have been keeping me from rear-ending the person in front of me. I'll look for my skid marks tomorrow. (just after exit 60, if you're heading east on Hwy. 66.) After calming down a bit, I explain to her in that serious Mommy tone that if only Mommy or Daddy is present, and driving, we cannot turn around to look at you, Lizzy. I'm sorry, but it's so that we all stay safe. I make sure she says she understands. Lizzy waits a beat or two, then says, "Mommy, look at THIS!" Aiieeeee. Kids.

Oh, yeah -- Lizzy insisted on the "Larry Bob gloves song" this morning. We have amassed five or six Veggie Tales CDs, and a couple of Sesame Street ones. She has Winnie the Pooh songs coming for her birthday. If I can get hold of the Disney Princesses, I guess that would be the logical next step. So, we have to rack our brains, running all songs from all Veggie Tales CDs through the child filter in our heads, to assess which song she desires. I said, "Can you sing it, honey? How does it go?" She sang a couple of lines, and I realized it was a song that mentions LOVE a lot. It's cute to watch her singing away phonetically to the words, but my enthusiasm for all these neat Christian songs she's learning wanes a bit when I realize that "gloves" and "love" are synonymous in this instance.

Tuesday, October 25, 2005

question of faith

I'm just full o' the bloggin' today, aren't I!
(yeah, I hear you -- "full of something, anyway." HAR.)

Matt and I were driving along the other day. He loves to come out of nowhere with these questions.

"So, if Adam and Eve were the first people... And they had kids..." Yep, I know where this one's going.

"There were other tribes of people."
"But, from where?"
"I don't really know. The Bible doesn't say."
"So ... you've been a Christian for 34 years." (well, not exactly. But, okay.) "And you've never thought about this?" (yes, I have.) But, it doesn't BOTHER you not to have an answer?"
and, the zinger -- "See, if Christians had answers to these questions, I could take it all seriously. This -- this is why I'm not a Christian."

I pointed out that there's a large faith element to being a Christian. God doesn't guarantee us all the answers.
But the truth is, I don't much care. Oh, I care deeply about what Matt thinks, and about trying to get him his answers. And, before you offer your C.S. Lewis books, he's received at least three copies already. He's not a reader. (not looking TOO hard for these answers, you see. Apparently it's up to me to read the books and pass along the wisdom.) But I don't really care if I have unanswered questions. I don't need to know everything. I'm not sure if that's a mental weakness, or a spiritual strength. Or just laziness on my part?

I've been rolling this around my head the past couple days. I have some silly, rather cliched arguments, but nothing great. Anyone learn anything cool in seminary that they'd like to pass along?

edited to add

Two more thoughts on my last post:

I need to say how grateful I am that the remnants of a hurricane merely pointed out a leak problem that I already had, but didn't destroy my home or render me adrift on the charity of others in another state, for instance. God bless and protect and help those still in that situation, or even much milder, but still dire, straits.

And, I just realized the irony (?), well, humor of some kind of the post about fretting about a hole in my roof and the preceding entry about sharing the home with others and not worrying. Heh heh.

hole in the bucket

WARNING: Suggestions of lowbrow, 2-year-old humor ahead. Which aren't the point of the story, anyway.

Last night, I'm lying in bed with Lizzy at about 10:15, trying to talk her into going to sleep so I can, when she says, "Who's got gas?" I said, "Not me! Is it Lizzy?" and she said, "No!" Then I realize that, actually, I DO hear a strange noise... But it's more of a, oh NO!, dripping. Rather constant. I get up and check out the window area, where I (or someone) mistakenly left the top part of the window open a couple days ago. The window's closed. So the water that's dripping across the top of the window shade and down must be from the ...

roof.

We had an incident two weekends ago when Rita or whomever it was blew through. Chicks, man! They're nothin' but trouble! But we thought, well, rain THAT hard for THAT long is bound to find a way into your home. (we've turned into simultaneously the most optimistic, and the most fearful, people since owning a home. I hate owning stuff. Seriously; no joke there.) So we blew off the fact that there's now a brown stain the size of a fuzzy caterpillar on steroids on Lizzy's ceiling.
Last night showed that we have a serious problem. So Matt and I, at about 10:30, were flying about, trying to find a piece of easily moved furniture that would be tall enough and sturdy enough for us to stand on and get a good look at what's going on in the attic. Sure enough, those blasted solar panels that someone probably put on in 1976 or so are leaking around the posts. We think. The panels aren't in use, and probably haven't been for years and years; we've been scared off by rumors of how much they cost to remove. Not exactly a priority, until now.

I was glad to see all the rain last night, because Lizzy's pumpkin patch field trip is canceled and I no longer have to a) go on it, and feel guilty about missing work while I'm supposed to be 'in charge' while my boss is away for a couple days, or b) go to work and feel guilty that I'm missing one of Lizzy's field trips.
So now I'm in the office, spending work time, er, blogging, but also calling roofers. Dangit.

Monday, October 24, 2005

what does this say about me?

Ahem. Lizzy will NOT officially be Cinderella for Christmas. I imagine she will, as usual, be Lizzy for Christmas.
Make that Halloween.
Ahem.
(I leave the post below untouched for your amusement, however.)

every little girl is a princess

It's official -- after a bit of indecision, Lizzy will be Cinderella for Christmas.
What, you say? You thought she was ALWAYS going to be Cinderella? Well, that was before she started watching Dumbo, and wanted to be "a clown like Dumbo." Except, when shown several clown costumes, they didn't suit her fancy. (I would've given much to see her with a little red nose and curly rainbow wig. Ah, well.) So we found ourselves in the odd position of talking her back into being Cinderella, because, well, though the outfit and its many accessories is/are expensive, it's easier than the uncertainty of having NOTHING TO WEAR for Boo at the Zoo! And, of course, Halloween! And Mommy needs those cute photos for the albums and for the relatives.
I'm not sure if she likes the outfit. She acted all coy and weird when we put it on -- kinda shy. But she looked FANTASTIC. It's a bit scary to see your 2-year-old in what amounts to a prom dress. Oddly, Disney sells long white child-sized gloves for the Belle costume, but not the Cinderella costume. So we stole them from the Belle area. They really make the Cindy costume, I must say.
I'm fully prepared for her to be one of 65 thousand Cinderellas in the greater D.C. area. She's not at the "I want to be original and different" stage, it would seem.
Now for the annual struggle of how to keep the child warm without completely covering the outfit you just spent a half-day's wages on... How many starving children could've eaten for what we spent on this thing. I'd rather not know.

pride, or something like it

On our way home last Friday, Matt and I were, or at least I was, feeling especially giddy about it being the weekend. I think it's because the previous weekend felt a little nuttier than usual, so I was looking forward to a bit of relaxing and house-straightening.

We got off the metro at Rosslyn, as usual, and were headed into the building there (at the Tivoli entrance, if you know what I'm talking about) to get our car out of the garage. You know how sometimes, when you're opening a door and walking through it, the 'personal space' issue gets a bit tricky? (I do believe perhaps only my D.C.-area friends will know what the heck I'm talking about.) Especially these particular doors. You open one, or it's still swinging closed, and you start to step through it, and someone on the other side was about to step through it, too ... anyway, really no big deal. Unless you're totally having a bad day, or just a complete bunghole in the first place, I guess. Because I assure you that Matt and I are not rude people when it comes to respecting others' space in social situations. This particular lady we ran into that day (not literally) was one or both of those things that I described, and when Matt stepped up to the door (one of four at that spot) and walked through it, instead of holding it for her, I guess, she turned around and said, "F**khead!" We were rather shocked, and unsure that we'd heard her correctly. Matt turned around and said, "Uh, What?!" She paused for a beat, then repeated herself, rather emphatically. I grabbed his arm and hauled him away, lest he come up with a suitably sarcastic, not foul but accurately evil response (which he is capable of -- and, let's just say this woman was not without her physical flaws), and we blew off steam by making up comments and saying them to each other instead of to her. Barely a half-step better than an actual altercation, I realize. I found myself shaking my head and wondering what it is that GETS to people sometimes. I mean, we're all human, for pity's sake! Can you be a LITTLE kind? Just slightly? When you're in a public place and someone does something that really wasn't a big deal AT ALL?? Matt ventured that she must be having a very bad day. He was feeling a bit more charitable than I was at that point.

We went on our merry way, picked up Lizzy, went home. Matt made us dinner, then went out with his friends (pre-planned. I'm big into the pre-planning, now that I have a kid and a pre-plan means that SHE is what I do all night if Matt does something else). Lizzy and I played, she went to bed, I caught up on some taped TV shows, and didn't hit the hay until about 1:30 a.m. (really late for me these days.)

About two minutes later, I hear a car drive up and male voices outside. Some door slamming. MY car doors.

A bit of background: Matt asked me earlier that evening "if it would be cool if his brother came over and crashed that night." In all honesty, I'm not a big fan. But Matt grew up, and still somewhat resides in, this culture among his good friends that mi casa es su casa, and it's totally normal to have someone, or someones, sprawled across your furniture the next morning, possibly with the tv on still from the night before. Me, not so much. The mind attempts, at times, to imagine 1) my father having friends come over and 'crash' on our couch in my childhood, and 2) my mother's probable response to that. It Just Didn't Happen That Way in our household. In fact, if pressed to name a good close friend of my dad's, I really can't. It was kinda my mom and my dad, and then us kids.
So it's the classic, "This is the way the normal world does things, and you're just out of whack, so loosen up/get with the program" mentality on both sides, where Matt and I are concerned. He grew up in the wacky, out of control household(s) -- product of divorce -- and I grew up in the small-town, apple pie, rebelling meant I belched at the dinner table or passive-aggressively 'forgot' to help clean up that night.

On with the story. So it turns out that Matt has brought over his brother Nick, and one of his best friends, Shane, who might as well be their relative, really. And, you know, both are okay fellows. Both are rather heavy smokers, though, which irks me where Lizzy is concerned (okay, maybe I AM uptight). And, as you all probably remember, we just got a new couch. Which I did not put in one penny to buy. And which has a pull-out bed feature. But is that ever utilized? What, when it's so easy just to fall asleep on the couch itself? Thus sealing its fate to be as worthless and middle-sinky as the couch we just threw out? HA.

So they go in the kitchen and start ho-ho-hoing and rifling through the fridge or whatever. I was SO MAD. Why? I honestly cannot say. The best (and worst) I can come up with was a giant wave of entitlement. This is My House. How Dare Matt bring people into My House. It was Barely Okay for his brother to "crash" there. But TWO people? Two half-drunk, smoky-stinky people!! NO. So I went downstairs -- again, at nearly 2 a.m. -- and told him it would be the Last Time, in loud tones (but not too loud -- sleeping tot upstairs). Matt was unimpressed with this public display, and came upstairs to tell me so. So he stood there in the bedroom, as I was trying to tell him to go away, nothing good would come of this conversation while I was so hot under the nightgown collar, and let me sleep. Go play with his friends, I believe I said. Go wallow on the couch. Go have a smoke (outside). But Matt was not content to let sleeping girls lie. He told me that I was being unreasonable, unfair to his friends, and disrespectful to him. Which was all true. I told him his friends were losers, and that they needed to not come over in this way.

And then, when he finally did go back downstairs, I lay there, awake and steaming, thinking about what Jesus would've done. Remembering something I'd read that day, or maybe the morning before, in Oswald Chambers' "My Utmost For His Highest" -- it's relatively easy to step up and big the big person, to be holy and helpful, in the big, public moments. It's much harder, and much more telling, in the 24/7, daily grind. In your own home. With people you maybe don't like so much.

And, you know, that whole sharing your blessings thing. That whole, living openly and holding things with open hands. SHARING. LOVING. Extending GRACE. Letting people maybe put their shoes up on your brand new couch (which they probably didn't do anyway), because it's a couch. And they're people. People who, for all I know, know one Christian -- ME. And which is more important -- couches, or people?

I managed to sneak out the door early the next morning (pre-planned -- I went scrapbooking) without having to look anyone in the eye.

I've been praying ever since, each morning, that God gives me enough love and grace each day to treat people with kindness. I have extended a definite lack of kindness and grace recently. Sunday's service really hit the spot, too. More on the Sermon on the Mount -- living with open hands. Not worrying. Not hoarding. Not valuing things that aren't eternal.

Oh, and not being judgmental... I loved what Mike said about how, in a world that lacked judgment, the People magazines and the Cosmopolitans would lay in a heap near the cash register, gathering dust. Ah, for that day. If we didn't CARE how skinny or fat Lindsay Lohan was, she wouldn't feel she needed to lose weight. And then lose too much. And then get lambasted for that. And then decide to gain it back... Okay, I do work in the features dept., so give me a bit of a break for knowing all this.

People are eternal. Stuff, isn't. Someday, I want to remember this, all day (and all night) long.